I work with ambitious, high achieving women of color who have put their all into their careers but are now recognizing the dire need to tend to the neglected parts of their lives. My clients have come to realize that they cannot operate at their full potentials when they repress and ignore the “human” sides of themselves. They have reached their limits and are serious about turning their attention to their social, emotional, and relational lives.
I work with women around their relationship issues because I believe that fundamentally, the root of all of our emotional struggles–depression, anxiety, stress, loneliness, lack of motivation, self-loathing–stems from broken relationships. Human beings are social creatures who find and form their identities, experience their deepest wounds, discover their strengths and weaknesses, and find healing and fulfillment in the context of relationships. It is through our most difficult relationships that we come to know the deepest parts of ourselves, and it is through knowing ourselves that we learn to thrive in relationships and therefore in all areas of life.
Contact me today to schedule your free consultation if you identify with any of the situations or emotions captured in the following vignettes:
Breakup
You broke up with your ex over a year ago, but you can’t seem to get over them. Every time you go on a date, you find yourself comparing them to your ex. You still can’t imagine your life without them. You feel empty and incomplete. You blame yourself for things not working out. You’re starting to give in to the belief that you’re not good enough to be in a healthy relationship.
Work Relationships
Even though you have gone above and beyond to prove yourself in order to acquire the management position you are currently in, your employees do not respect you. Now your boss is questioning your leadership capability. You aren’t sure if being the only minority on the team plays some kind of role. Not only is your job at risk, but the situation is starting to take a toll on your self-esteem.
Dating Issues
You’ve been on countless dates, yet you can’t seem to find a lasting match. Whenever things start to seem like they are going well, the other person is suddenly “not interested in being in a relationship” or ghosts you. You wonder if there is something wrong with you. You feel unloveable. You’re starting to feel hopeless that you are never going to find a significant other.
Loneliness
You find yourself alone in your apartment every day after work. You spend your weekends working because there’s nothing better to do, but deep down inside you know you stay busy with work to distract you from your feelings. You have a few friends, but they always seem too busy for you. As for dating? You don’t even know where to begin. You’ve been so busy focusing on your career, you don’t know the first thing about it.
Significant Other
You’ve been with your partner for many years, but you’ve been growing further apart. For a while, you argued nonstop. At moments you felt like you hated your partner. Now you hardly speak to each other, let alone fight. You have been finding your mind wandering lately to other people, but you just can’t bring yourself to pull the plug on this relationship. You feel stuck and at a loss of what to do.
Parents
You’re a responsible, independent adult, yet you still feel controlled by your parents. You can’t seem to separate your agenda from theirs. When you’re honest with yourself, getting their approval drives your motivation and defines your view of success. Yet, no matter what you do, it never seems good enough for them. You are tired of the endless cycle of disappointment, but you don’t dare ever tell them how you really feel.